Hello everyone! It has been a while! Happy new year and hope your 2018 has been brilliant so far.
I had two thoughts today (21/01/18). The first, why I go to church and the second, what the word “forsake” means.
When I was younger, I would go to church because my family went to church. After that, I started going to church out of habit and then out of boredom. Eventually I stopped going to church because the experience was no longer unique.
While in sacrament meeting today, a question came into my mind. Why do you go to church Nancy? For a moment I was taken back & I was going to say, “because church is church you know”. But then, I thought back to the times I was going to two churches at the same time or the times I went to a different church. I realised the question I was asking myself was “why am I still here?” even better, “how am I still here?”. I repeat “how am I still here?”.
I’ll be honest, the last couple of months/ years felt like a tornado or a storm or something like that. Well a spiritual storm. And it felt like I wasn’t making any progress, I was just stuck there in doubt and confusion that was never going to end. I wrote a couple of blogs to express how I was feeling but I was just so frustrated. I had so many questions that were not being answered and I was starting to get irritated.
It’s 2018 now and I have since realised that storm I was in, is slowly subsiding. Through my frustration, I found courage. Through my pain, I rediscovered God’s love. Through that irritation, my patience somehow started to surface. Through patience my heart was softened. And by that, some answers began to flow in. I was all smiles when I understood the purpose of the question. Yes, I go to church because I want to be uplifted spiritually. Yes, I love my church family. Yes, I am happy here. But that’s not all. God wants me to be here, God brought me here in fact, God is here. What I mean by God is here is that, the truth of God is in this Church and it’s God’s church. I felt and still feel a deep sense of joy knowing that all the times I’ve been complaining, God has been listening.
One thing I have learnt is: as we grow, we begin to understand what is really important. Not to say my questions before were not important. Of course they were! But, I dwelt on the negatives too much and many other trivial details. As we begin to understand God’s purpose for us, some of the doubts we have become insignificant when compared to the bigger picture.
What does forsake mean? Read my next blog 😊
